Resiliency The Podcast

Jenn Quader (00:05)
Welcome to Resiliency, the podcast. Today's guest is the president and chief operating officer of Western National Property Management, where she oversees the management of over 23,000 multifamily units in California and Nevada valued at more than $8 billion. Now guys, that's like more than 20,000 families.

who this woman is responsible for the team oversight and development and training and property management for. And her firm also manages retail and office and commercial properties on a large scale. Now more than that, today's guest is also known for her philanthropic efforts. She serves on the board of many organizations, including the nonprofit called Laura's House, which we'll talk about a little bit more in this episode.

And she's also been a widely recognized strong leader. She was recognized as a best boss of 2024. She was given the Robert A. McNeely Trailblazer Award at her company and her company, Western National, was named one of the best places to work just this past year in commercial real estate. It's an amazing thing. And I want you as an audience to understand that this is a huge four trillion dollar industry that is

driven in a lot of ways by a male counterpart. And here we have today a very strong female leader who has really showed us what resilience means. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the great Miss Laura Khouri

Laura Khouri (01:34)
Thank you, Jen. I'd like to meet that person you just talked about. my gosh. ⁓ What an introduction. Thank you. I'm so happy to be here.

Dr Kelly Culver (01:45)
Laura, congratulations on all of the things that you have achieved all of these phenomenal accomplishments. And thank you for being a trailblazing woman. That's really, really awesome. That gets us super excited. So maybe we could start with what does resiliency mean to you?

Laura Khouri (01:54)
Thank you very much, Dr. Kemp.

Thank you.

⁓ boy, my life is nothing but resiliency. ⁓ you know, as I thought about, ⁓ anticipating this question coming, coming from you today, what I thought about is I can't say it any better than, than Maya Angelou did. ⁓ she said that, you know, I can be changed by, ⁓ the events that, happened to me, but I refuse to be reduced by them. And I think that's really for me, what encompasses, ⁓ resiliency. There has been.

There have been so many different things in my life that have just come at me like a fire hose, right? And you can either wallow in self-pity or you can pick yourself up and move in a different direction.

Dr Kelly Culver (02:43)
That's very, very powerful. The wallow in self-pity or pick yourself up. We talk about that at Resiliency, the podcast, Don't We Jen? We talk about you have to walk through the challenges that are in front of you because when you come out on the other side, there's something brilliant and more powerful than you might ever have expected it to be. So I think for our listeners, we're pretty curious about that journey that you've been on. So you've gone from...

⁓ what we will call a Gal Friday, and maybe you can explain what that means, to being Western Nationals President of Property Management. Can you tell us the story of how you got the Gal Friday job and what it took to climb to being president?

Laura Khouri (03:26)
So we're going back almost 40 years to the day. I was hired in 1985, April 29th, 1985. And I answered an ad, a three line ad in the Orange County Register. Remember, in 1985, there was no internet. There were no cell phones. There wasn't voicemail. If you wanted a job, you went to the classifieds in your local newspaper. And so I answered an ad and I sent my resume in and I was called in for a 20 minute interview.

And again, Friday, ⁓ it's really about how fast can you type? Can you drive a car? Because here at Western, it was about making deposits at the bank, running to the stationery store to pick up stationery supplies, because again, no internet, you can't order things online. ⁓ It was delivering the mail every day. It was typing on an IBM Selectric typewriter with carbon paper. Again, no computers.

And that it was the fancy term is gopher. That's really what I was. Go for this, go for that. And so that was the, ⁓ the job that I applied for. Gal Friday. Now having, having gotten there and being hired 20 minutes into the interview, literally took a cut and pay to come here. I had had a bunch of office jobs and that sort of a thing. I was 24 years old at the time. And so if you're calculating, actually now know how old them, how old them, ⁓ but.

thinking about the journey, took me about 18 months to figure out what I needed to do to get ahead. And the reason being is because I was young. I was the type of employee that, hey, it's quarter to five. Where are we going for happy hour? Right? Where are we all going? Right? As opposed to sitting there, finishing whatever project I had in front of me, closing the file and moving on. And so 18 months into my appointment, finally woke up and I'm like, well, wait.

You know, if I actually stayed a little bit longer and got this done, you know, maybe I'll feel better in the morning. It won't be hitting me as I come in the door. And what I didn't realize at the time, and maybe, maybe some employees don't realize this, is that you're always being watched. There's someone always watching you and seeing how you're doing, you know, not as if they're spying on you, but they notice. And at that point I got noticed and I received my first promotion to office manager about two years into this journey. And I got to be honest.

worst boss you'd ever want to meet. Worst boss. ⁓

Dr Kelly Culver (05:53)
Ha ha ha!

Jenn Quader (05:57)
humility is amazing. ⁓

Laura Khouri (05:57)
But no, it's so

Dr Kelly Culver (05:58)
⁓ stop.

Laura Khouri (06:01)
true. I had three employees, right? And I'm sure they ruined the day that they had to report to me. And the leadership training. So when my receptionist calls me, you know, eight o'clock on a Monday morning and she says, listen, I have a sick daughter. She was a single mom. She had a six-year-old daughter and she's got a fever and it won't be in today. To which I respond to her, ⁓ find some Tylenol, get a babysitter and get your butt to work.

Oh yeah, oh yeah, I'm not lying. I actually did this. Now she ultimately forgave me many years down the road. Yeah, worst boss ever. So throughout my career, I have had several people who have crossed my path and wanting to help, or I would see the really good things in them because the truth be told is I think in the end,

I am an accumulation of all the bad bosses I've ever had, right? And figuring out how I don't want to be, how I don't want people to feel after interacting with me, that their lives are just as important as mine and doesn't matter what kind of title you have. So having people, you know, step in and say, hey, yeah, you don't want to do it that way. And having people treat me that way, going, ooh, that doesn't feel good. I then.

became a vice president of operations a few years down the road, probably about 10 years later, and grew en masse just different departments and people and that sort of a thing. And ⁓ then I was given an opportunity to run an ancillary division here at Western and make money. So revenue as opposed to just being office staff support. And in my first year, I brought in a million dollars, ⁓ half of which was all profit for ownership. so I was, and I was, you know what?

It wasn't me alone. had a great team, but something to be said about timing and being in the right place at the right time and knowing the right people that can help. so ⁓ I became the president in 2010, so 15 years ago. And I don't think I'm going to go any further in my career. There is the CEO, except that I'm kind of married to that guy. So I don't really want this position. I didn't, I didn't, I didn't start that way, but we got married in 2014. So.

Jenn Quader (08:16)
That...

Dr Kelly Culver (08:17)
You

Jenn Quader (08:21)
That's one of the things

I love about you, Laura, that I do happen to know that, that you are married to the CEO, but I feel like it's very important for our listeners. I always say it to myself. I'm like, that girl climbed from Gal Friday to president long before she married that CEO. That was a whole different thing. ⁓ And now it's just love. But I want to know a little more, Laura, because you're such a ⁓ unique person in that there are very few people

Laura Khouri (08:36)
definitely. ⁓

Jenn Quader (08:51)
who have the ability to go from that type of a real entry level job all the way up to the top. And you talked a little bit about being an accumulation of all the bad bosses that you've had. You were just named a best boss in the last year by a big national publication. What is it taking today in today's uncertainty, in today's world, what is it taking to be a good and resilient boss today?

Laura Khouri (09:20)
⁓ it takes active participation. It means that you show up and you show up in every form, right? we've heard time and time again, it's like, you you've got to act the way that you want people to be right. and, know, be a good leader and be by example, but it's more than just that, you know, what, does that mean? What is the example? ⁓ the example is when you, when you show up for others, you, you volunteer for things.

and you bring them with you. ⁓ You're present in the moment, meaning that you're not, ⁓ I'm sorry, I'm sorry, what was that question, Jen? Hang on, just one. You're not on your phone, right? No, you're not on your phone. And you're paying attention to them. You're not on your computer when they're in front of you, unless you're researching something together. You are respectful of their lives. You actually know something about them and what they tell you, you write it down so you can remember.

Jenn Quader (09:57)
Take your time.

Laura Khouri (10:16)
to talk about it later, right? You have a work ethic that probably outshines most everyone else, meaning that they don't put in as many hours as you do, but what they do put in you appreciate. ⁓ have humility and ⁓ you also have a sense of urgency. I think most importantly though, ⁓ being a good leader is when you show up, you show up for others. Like for example,

in the bad times, like when there's a death in the family or when there's some sort of horrible accident or illness that you are there talking to them on the phone, showing up the hospital, doing what you can to help alleviate whatever stress is going on in your lives. That's how I would describe a good leader.

Jenn Quader (11:05)
Laura, I love it too because I see correlations not only in how you treat your team, but also in how you treat your clients when you talk about showing up for others. I know, for example, there were challenges during the pandemic and your company pioneered, I think through you personally, rent relief that helped hundreds of people. Can you speak to that a little bit, to some of these business challenges and how that concept of showing up for others, how do you lead that both in a team and also out to your external client audiences?

Laura Khouri (11:34)
So I'm lucky enough to manage a portfolio where half of ⁓ the buildings that we manage are owned or run by limited partnerships of which Mike, CEO and husband is the general partner. The other half of my portfolio are clients. And I think the date was probably March 17th, 17th through the 20th and California is shutting down. And we are in an emergency ⁓ executive committee meeting and that there are six of us on executive committee, know, all C suites.

And, and I don't know what April rents are going to look like because California is like, now we're shelter in place. What the, what the heck does that mean? Right. So, ⁓ I said to them at the time, I said, you know, I don't know what kind of rents are going to get. And I am, I am responsible for distributions to ownership, you know, making sure that we continue to run our properties, that sort of thing. And I suggested, you know, what if we offered a discount to our residents who can pay on the first.

And this is long before these moratoriums on evictions and that sort of thing came into play before government got involved. And I said, I don't intend to evict anyone on April 1st if they can't pay, but at least I'll get a better feel for how much money we're going to be able to collect in rent so that I can be responsible to our ownership. ⁓ My team, my executive committee team agreed. And then the next step was to go to our clients to say, this is what we're doing on the own side of the business. And we do encourage you to do that.

Well, what that led to was three months of rent relief because we thought, as everyone else did, that the pandemic was going to end pretty soon, right? We didn't know it was going to go on for years. But after three months, we ended up giving away $7 million in rent relief and these 5 % discounts to those renters who could in fact pay their rent. The other thing too, and I didn't think about this at the time, is that it just created such a sense of goodwill.

When again, I was in president mode thinking, okay, I've got a fiduciary responsibility. I've got to take care of ownership and investors. But in the end, the goodwill that it created through our renters like, wow, because to my knowledge, there wasn't any other company doing it. So that's really what happened during the pandemic.

Jenn Quader (13:50)
to say, wow, I work in that industry, you know, just for all of our listeners, I think they know that I work across the commercial real estate industry. That is very uncommon to see management company move first. And I think it really speaks to some of what you're talking about in this episode, Laura, to these personal values of outshining, you know, really in that case, you guys outshined your competitors, you outshined everyone.

by really showing up for what other people needed. And I think that's very clearly a core tenet of your leadership. I know that Dr. Kelly has a couple of questions for you, but I wanna dig into one place I've always just personally wondered and so I wanna ask. As I look at big decisions that you made, like offering $7 million in rent relief without even having to, I also think about things that I know about your leadership. Again, I've...

For our listeners, I've had the chance to know Laura for many years. And one thing I remember learning about her early on was that she wrote an email or a blog post, something personal to her team every single day. That has always blown my mind. And Laura, my question to you for all of us on here is that the morning where you wake up and your hair is stuck like this and you just didn't sleep well and everything's not fitting and you just are feeling like a yuckaroo, where do you go? How do you...

Laura Khouri (15:02)
Yeah.

Jenn Quader (15:09)
pull that out in an authentic way. That's what I want to know.

Laura Khouri (15:14)
Wow, when you think about showing up for others, what I talked about earlier, it's not just about you. doesn't matter how you feel. There are people who rely on you, who look up to you, who need guidance. And even if they don't think they need it, they want it. And that's what happened during the pandemic. And you're right about that. So for 567 days straight, I sent an email company-wide to 1,000 people ⁓ about either the pandemic or

At the time I discovered memes. I had no idea what a meme was before. And then I would theme the memes, right? You know, so there's one time I remember the theme was aisles as in like grocery aisle, that kind of a thing. It was just a picture of all these empty aisles, including Main Street on Disneyland and a church aisle. I did a church and a mosque and a temple. And the theme was, can't wait to walk down these aisles again, right?

It was that kind of thing. most of it, toward the end, they all just turned into, you know, comedic relief for the team. ⁓ My husband, though, would not be undone because when I started sending these daily emails that started that third week of March, ⁓ he decided, well, I'm not going to write a blog every day, but I'm going to send some entertainment. And he would send video ⁓ to the same team that I sent to, right? And so it would became the dueling C-suite, right? I'd send an email and he'd send an email.

And to the point where one day he sent ⁓ Elton John's, I'm Still Standing. If you haven't seen that video, ⁓ Elton John is dancing around on a beach in his underwear with a whole bunch of other people in a bunch of speedos, right? It was just so not HR appropriate. And I clicked on it and I hadn't sent my email for the day yet.

We were actually competing against one another who could get theirs out first. Right. And I opened that up and I just went red faced because what I didn't tell you is that I've had a 10 year tour of duty in HR during my career here, where I ran HR as a senior vice president. So I'm very sensitive to that. Right. And I'm watching Elton just parade around on the beach. And so I immediately went into his office and I said, ⁓ we got a problem, got a problem. Right. And he's like, what? Well, he didn't watch the whole video. He just saw the song and you know,

copy the link and send it off.

You know, there was another time, and this is pretty funny, where he misspelled the word shirt and he forgot the R. Yeah, yeah, and he was bragging about how he was ironing his own shirts except without the R. And of course, he never asked. So my response, again, his was the first out of the day, and my response later that day is there's, know what, I think our new cuss word will be shirt because you can say, let's say bull shirt.

Jenn Quader (17:46)
⁓ dear!

Laura Khouri (18:08)
cow shirt and every imaginable word. Yes, bull shirt. I do. That's a bunch of shirt, right? And so what we created though was ⁓ a sense of community with these emails back and forth and in front of a thousand people, right? And to the point where people would respond and I would connect with them and ask them for permission to reprint what they had written me. So people saw their name in lights and that sort of a thing, but.

Jenn Quader (18:12)
shirt. I call it bowl shirt. I love it.

Laura Khouri (18:37)
Yes. So long story short, that's the 567 days of emails to the team during the pandemic.

Jenn Quader (18:45)
Laura, that's some good shirt right there. Some good shirt. My comment will be, you know, if anybody has picked up a newspaper or read a headline in a little bit, I think they'll know that corporate workplaces are having problems with retention and stickiness. so what a wonderful resilient example.

Laura Khouri (18:48)
Right?

Dr Kelly Culver (18:48)
Ha ha.

Jenn Quader (19:08)
of a company that is using levity, that is using entertainment, but also is so consistent in bringing that kind of stickiness, I think it's very clear that that aids in the resilience of the company as a whole. So that's really, really cool. And funny shirt, also funny shirt.

Laura Khouri (19:23)
Yes.

funny shirt.

Dr Kelly Culver (19:30)
You know, in both instances that you've talked to us about that, the leading by example around the rent relief and the leading by example in keeping your community engaged. Both of those instances are really strong examples of what I would call social capital. So you build that social capital, you build that social reputation, you cement that reputation across the industry. And then that shows people a vision of

Laura Khouri (19:32)
Yeah.

Dr Kelly Culver (19:59)
what they could become that connects a really strong purpose and a meaning and a value to who you are, how you behave. it in many ways, it helps people see the path that they can, they could have a journey like yours and they see what that path looks like. It's the, you know, I have a question for you around women being underrepresented in high level leadership positions. And I mean, I want to bring you back to your comment about this phone.

Laura Khouri (20:16)
Mm-hmm.

Dr Kelly Culver (20:29)
and not being on the phone. It's really interesting. Last week, Jamie Diamond from ⁓ JP Morgan put out a notice to all of us C-suite and said, when you come in and you have a meeting with me, don't be on your phone and don't answer your email. I don't care what it is unless someone's dying. Because if I'm giving you my time, I expect you to give me your time because we're not leading by example to the younger generation and it has to change. And you're doing that too.

So I'm really curious to hear from you. Women do tend to be underrepresented in high-level leadership positions across many industries, whether it's in the United States, whether it's here in Canada, whether it's in Europe. So what's your advice to others who are looking to succeed like you have?

Laura Khouri (21:17)
⁓ If I have one bit of advice for all women, don't lose your femininity. Don't think that you have become more manly to do your job because I think there's a definite ⁓ divide between men and women and how they react and work with people. Women do bring what I would call the softer side of Sears to the job, to the workplace.

But, and I made that mistake early on when I became the VP of HR. I thought I had to be more masculine. I literally cut all of my hair off. I thought I had to learn how to play golf and I'm just not a golfer. I tried it. Although I do possess a golf record for the most balls lost on a course, I, you know.

⁓ I thought I had to be more manly. I thought I had to watch the games on the weekend. on the Monday morning meeting where they're all gathered together that I could speak to who won the football game, you know, and, learned early on that I didn't need to do any of that. It wasn't about becoming a man. It was about bringing the best version of myself that I could and the best representation of my team that I could to the table. It's also about ⁓ Khalil.

Dr Kelly Culver (22:09)
Hmm.

Laura Khouri (22:34)
Jabon says this, I think I said that wrong, Khalil Jabron. Yes. I learned tolerance from the intolerant. You know, I learned how to listen from the talkative, it's about listening and watching and not trying to be the star of the room. I've seen that happen time and again with men, right? ⁓ You don't have to have the last word.

Unfortunately for women, if you get emotional, they'll use it against you. So you really must learn how to control your emotions, even though men get to do whatever they want to sometimes, right? ⁓ But it is about learning, listening, paying attention and becoming and presenting your best version of yourself, I think, for women.

Dr Kelly Culver (23:16)
I really appreciate what you've just said about not being like a man and not behaving like a man. I have colleagues in Australia and you know, women are extraordinarily underrepresented there in leadership positions and many, many of my friends who are women who have achieved the heights they have, have had to behave and act like a man and they have a really hard, harsh edge and they become disconnected to 50 % of the people in their workplace. It's tough.

Laura Khouri (23:43)
Yes.

Yes, absolutely.

Jenn Quader (23:47)
kind of want to stay on this for one more minute only because we're in this world where gender is a big topic. And what I like is that what you said is it's about bringing the best person. It's really not about whether you act like a woman or act like a man. It's about how to bring your best self to work. ⁓ I think I want to ask before I move into our next topic, just to kind of, I guess, close the loop a little bit on resilient leadership there at Western National.

Laura Khouri (24:06)
Yes.

Jenn Quader (24:16)
One of the other things I happen to know about you, Laura, is that your team is really well-tenured. You have people who've been working there for 20, 30 years. And so I guess I want to ask, you know, in that same realm of advice for our listeners, who many of our listeners are, you know, they are investors, they are business owners, they are change makers, they're trying to lead teams. I wonder, ⁓ how do you, you know, we've talked a lot about how you gain that social capital.

But then in a more focused sense, when there are people you're working with and you need to help them bring their best to the company, how do you do that? How do you approach that?

Laura Khouri (24:52)
How do you exploit their strengths, right? How do you do that? ⁓ You let them go. You offer up an assignment. You see who takes what portion of it, and you just let them go. You can't micromanage. You can't say, how are you doing? You can say, come back to me when you're ready to talk about it, and I'm happy to guide you, or walk into my office at any time if you need a quick answer, send me text, whatever the case may be. My leadership is not...

⁓ is not about following up. My leadership is about letting go. So I let go and I let them go and do what they do best. I I have a team that everyone brings to the table, everything that they absolutely can. And they also know that I appreciate them because at every opportunity I'm going to do that. I'm going to say something, whether it's a quick email as a quick example.

We have a mystery shop program out on our sites where we have people pretend to be perspective renters and they come they call and that that phone call is recorded and then they they show up for an appointment and there they are toured around by our office team and for any associate who scores over a hundred on either one on both of those together I I get every I get everyone's shop so I get to see it

And I will just send that person a quick email that just says, what a great job you've done today, Jen. I'm so proud of you. Wow, 105 and 107. It doesn't get any better than that. Keep it up. And I sign it, Laura. ⁓ I mean what I say, but I also understand the impact that that has on them. It's like somebody's watching and I'm being appreciated, right? And so that's kind of the basis for my team is that in some special way, particularly here at the corporate office,

I will find the time to say thank you for what you've done or that was terrific or acknowledge them in a way that I know that they'll appreciate. A lot of people don't like to be acknowledged in front of an audience. They get embarrassed and you don't know that initially when you meet them, but you learn that. And so you find the way that works best for them.

Jenn Quader (27:03)
I love the impact that you're able to make and it really sounds like it can be done at a macro level and then at a micro level and it's just kind of that constant focus. And so with that, I wanna actually shift the conversation to another area of impact that I know is very strong with you, Laura, and that is philanthropy and giving back. And I wonder if you would talk a little bit and we're shifting gears here for the audience, but again.

Laura is both a business owner but also a really active member of the Orange County community and gives back to a lot of causes. But I specifically want to ask about Laura's house, which I know is not named after you. And I wonder if you could talk a little bit about how did you get involved with Laura's house?

Laura Khouri (27:45)
⁓ Well, Laura's House is a 31 year old agency, domestic violence agency here in Orange County. And I was asked in 2005, if I would help them with their annual gala. It was their biggest fundraising event of the year. And the reason that that came about is I have. ⁓

I have some friends who were on the board of Laura's house at the time who actually used to work here and they mentioned me because I used to put on thousand person holiday parties. We actually called them Christmas parties in those days, but a full sit down dinner at the end of the year for all of our associates at the time and their spouses or significant others. And so they said, she knows how to put on a party, let's get her. And so ⁓ I went to lunch and I agreed to help and I walked away and I thought, you know what?

I don't know much about Laura's house. know that it's an emergency shelter for women and children. And I think I'd like to know a little bit more. And so I called up Margaret Baston, who is ⁓ the current CEO and was at the time. And I said, do you think that I could get a tour of that shelter? And she said, yes, I'm happy to do that. And so I met her and I had to sign pages of confidentiality documents before I could go there. I I cannot disclose where it is, you know, or anything about it.

And I did that and she drove me there and I walked over the threshold of the open door and I was immediately taken back 28 years. It's just the weirdest thing that has ever happened to me. When I was 17, I had spent three days in a shelter for abused children because I grew up in a domestically violent and alcoholic household. And it was, it was so impactful that I, I, I just, didn't know what to do.

I walked my way through the house with Margaret and you had women and kids and babies and their therapy sessions. And I remember thinking the house was very dilapidated. ⁓ It seems like people would come in and help. You had an updated bathroom, but yet the kitchen was, you know, from the 1950s sort of thing. And we walked out and we got back in her car and I looked at her and I just started to cry. And she said, well, you've passed the test. And I said, no, I don't think you understand Margaret.

This is me. I've been here. I understand what's going on. It's something that I just buried, right? You know, as a 17 year old, they just buried it. moved on. I've literally, a lot of people don't know this, but I literally left home when I was 17. I am not one of those people who has any type of secondary education. So I never went to college. ⁓ I used to joke at the school of hard knocks, but the truth is, is that when I left home, I immediately had to start working.

So I supported myself and I graduated high school, but that was on my own, but that's as far as I got. So when Laura's house approached me and I went through all of that, I said, I'd love to help. said, I want to know if you want to be on the board. And I had never done any board work at that point. I just hadn't. But I said, sure. Right. Because that's what I do. I volunteer for things. have no idea what I'm doing, but I'm going to volunteer. ⁓ And, and that's what started my board work, which led to many other boards, but.

My passion for Laura's house is the fact that as a 17 year old, I had no place to go but to a home that had a ton of teenagers in it. I was only allowed to stay three days because that's all the county could fund. And then I was put back into the custody of my parents for the next three months until I ultimately left for good.

Jenn Quader (31:17)
Laura, I want to say thank you first for sharing that with us because that can't be easy, you know? And then secondly, I want to say, boy, doesn't life work in such interesting ways, you know, that you experience something so horrific and difficult as domestic violence within your home as a child, and then that you are now able to help those who are going through it. ⁓ It's pretty amazing.

Laura Khouri (31:21)
Welcome.

Jenn Quader (31:45)
I think the only thing I want to ask here is how could we help? I think that's what I want to know. You're a board director. Some of our audience is in Orange County. What's happening at Laura's house that we need to know about? How can our audience maybe help in that regard?

Laura Khouri (31:59)
Well,

thank you for that. Love Laura's house. So right as the pandemic was happening, right about 2019, we actually purchased a brand new building resource, counseling resource center. And we bought it for $6 million. And it's in, it's off a journey in Aliso Viejo. And we have, we've had this capital campaign going since then, because we had to pause like the rest of the world did during the pandemic. And so we were about to finish up our capital campaign. We're about $4 million away from.

from a $10 million goal. And so there's always that. ⁓ The other thing that Laura's House does is that there's a DVAC, so domestic violence ⁓ agency, is, it's the legal side of things. So in Garden Grove, for people who need help with restraining orders, right, that sort of a thing, this volunteer team goes to court with them ⁓ and also does a lot of things that relaxation techniques, you know, imagine you are,

you're a beaten woman and you have children and now you've got to go before a judge requesting a restraining order. You've never done any of this. Maybe you don't even have job. You don't know what to do, right? But the DVAC, as we call it, is there to help these women and children. And so there's a whole lot going on with Laura's House, not to mention all of the therapy sessions that we offer, personal empowerment programs.

And of course there's the shelter itself. It's a 49 bed shelter. We rebuilt it back in 2010. And ⁓ there's just so much that it offers. The thing about Laura's house and its mission is it's an ugly social disease and not a lot of people want to talk about that. They don't even want to admit that domestic violence still exists, but the truth is it does. And our job is to put it out of business one of these days.

Dr Kelly Culver (33:25)
You

Laura Khouri (33:46)
But in the interim, can always look them up at laurashouse.org and we take time, talent and resources for anyone who wants to offer any of those.

Dr Kelly Culver (33:56)
I like that time talent and resources and if you know, maybe we expand on that a bit more for people who are in Orange County and who are interested in in making a donation and you know, the capital donation is a bit overwhelming for them and they can't provide support going to court. There are things like I know some of the things that we look for here personal toiletries and things that that that help

children and women feel good about themselves even though they're in a particular spot that they don't want to be? Are there things or there are there those kinds of I'm going to say the softer side of donations that people could make to help feel someone feel good and confident about themselves as they work through the challenges that they have?

Laura Khouri (34:37)
It's a wonderful point, Dr. Kelly. Thank you for reminding me because we actually do accept all kinds of donations. ⁓ At Journey, Aliso Viejo AHO, there's a donation center. And part of what makes Flores House so successful is we have three separate resale stores. So people donate their clothes, they donate household items, and those go out to these stores ⁓ that then we sell. So we've got a cost of goods of $0.

yet and we're able to sell that. But as far as the personal items, yes, they will take anything. Can you imagine the number of diapers that are needed, right? You know, all of the personal type of toiletries and supplies and sundries, absolutely, they take all of that. the donation center then basically farms all of those donations out to where they need to go, including the emergency shelter.

Dr Kelly Culver (35:14)
Yeah.

Jenn Quader (35:33)
So important, so full circle. And you know, Laura, I'm going to ask you one more question before Kelly takes us into the fun part of Resiliency the Podcast, which is the rapid fire. But I have to ask this because we've we spent an entire episode really focused on your growth and how you impact others. You impact your team. You impact your clients. You impact people through Laura's house. And all of that is so beautiful. I want to ask as someone who admires your leadership and as someone who sees that and knows ⁓ what it takes.

Laura Khouri (35:40)
Okay.

Dr Kelly Culver (35:41)
you

Jenn Quader (36:02)
I want to ask the last question would be, how do you care for yourself? It's similar to what I asked last time, which was, you know, how do you get through when you're feeling that way? But this time is more, what are those strategies for those people who may be listening, who are trying to lead the way you're leading, who are spread out in a lot of ways, who are saying yes and volunteering? What do you do to protect and guard yourself so that you maintain your own personal resilience?

Laura Khouri (36:27)
That's a great question, Jen. So ⁓ there are many times that we could work ourselves to the bone, right? And we don't pay attention to that self-care. And that self-care could mean, are we eating the right way? Are we getting enough rest? Are we sleeping the way that we're supposed to? Are we taking enough time away to smell the roses, right? And smelling the roses, to many people, could be, you know what? I'm going to go for a walk, or I'm going to sit in meditation, or I'm going to pray.

And it's all of those that we have to remember not to lose sight of because if you give too much of yourself away, there's nothing left and you won't be able to give it to yourself or anybody else. so I'm lucky enough to be married to a man who really pays attention to that and can take one look at me and go, okay, it's time to go home. Let's go. Right. You've had enough for today. ⁓ but you also have to take the time and remember to exercise, get those endorphins going. Right.

because endorphins do so, so much for you. The other thing too, is when you think about, don't have time to do this right now, or I don't have time to go and eat properly, please make that time because it won't be available again. ⁓ It takes a little bit ⁓ of strategy and thinking and like, did I bring my lunch today? Yep, it's in my refrigerator right in back of me. It takes a little extra preparation time, but self-care is really important and it's not selfish at all.

Because if you're not good, you're not going to be good for anybody else.

Dr Kelly Culver (37:58)
very wise, very wise. I think that that's just, you know, that's the headline. If you're not good for you, you're not good for anyone else. Yeah. And it's tough, you know, there's all of these, all of these things that are coming at us all the time. And I think it's easy to say, all right, I'll just defer that or I'll defer that or I'll defer that. And what strikes me is your comment is you won't get that time back. And you won't. You never will. Yeah.

Laura Khouri (38:22)
You know. ⁓

Dr Kelly Culver (38:27)
Are you ready for some rapid fire questions? Okay. All right. Okay. Okay. So what's your favorite movie or TV show that makes you feel resilient?

Laura Khouri (38:29)
Okay, hit me. ⁓

Jenn Quader (38:31)
Drum roll!

Laura Khouri (38:40)
Oh my goodness. Okay. Uh, got a couple, uh, Ted Lasso loved Ted Lasso. Uh, yes. Uh, but I didn't discover it until, know, after it went away on a certification. Um, the other thing too, as I find myself right now, binging on this is us. Have you seen that show? I appear it's been around since 2017. I'm on season three, but whenever I have an opportunity, I'm going to watch 49 minutes of it because I am watching this family that has all of these things hitting them.

Dr Kelly Culver (38:44)
Ha!

Jenn Quader (38:45)
Yes! Love it!

Dr Kelly Culver (38:46)
you

Mm-hmm.

Laura Khouri (39:08)
but yet they always come back together. Every episode makes me cry, which I also think is a form of self-care for certain people. It's okay to cry and let those emotions out, but yeah, this is us. That's it for me right now.

Dr Kelly Culver (39:22)
And what about a favorite song that makes you feel resilient?

Laura Khouri (39:26)
⁓ this one's kind of an easy one. So I did a keynote in September and ⁓ I chose Dance the Night Away by Dua Lipa. Now, what I didn't know is it came from a Barbie movie because I never saw the Barbie movie, right? But what I liked about it is like it's it's kind of a never let them see you sweat kind of song. You know, it's like, you know, I'm going to smile and I'm going to shine regardless of what's going on. Right.

Again, that goes to Jen's question about how do you get up in the morning? It's like you just do it, right? So that's it right now.

Dr Kelly Culver (40:00)
You know, you had me there for a second when you said the dance the night away because Van Halen also has a song called dance the night away. And I thought, and that's one of my favorites all time songs. Love that one. Woohoo. Yeah, that's funny. What's the last thing that made you laugh? Like really laugh out loud.

Laura Khouri (40:05)
⁓ yes, yes. ⁓

I hear you. I'm a classic, a 70s classic girl. So yes, I love all of those songs. Yeah.

Jenn Quader (40:14)
love it.

Laura Khouri (40:25)
Oh, actually I was at a board meeting with the most recent one here at the beginning of the month. And at the board meeting, what the staff does is it brought us these, oh, kind of like a card, right? It was just a card, but it was a card that was drawn by one of the children in the shelter.

And on the inside, the volunteers wrote, thank you so much. Or the children might write crayon, thank you so much. They don't know who they're doing to, right? And my card, ⁓ they just randomly put them out in front of every ⁓ member of the board. My card said, you're awesome, right? And awesome was spelled incorrectly. It was just the cutest thing, right? And I'd show it to you, but I literally took it home to keep. And so at the end of the meeting, and not many people know this, but, ⁓

Dr Kelly Culver (41:08)
hahahaha

Laura Khouri (41:17)
Sheriff Don Barnes is on our board and between Don Barnes and Wayne Pinnell of Haskell and White, the three of us alternate in becoming the chairs of the board every six years or so. We just take over from one another and we do it. And in that meeting, Sheriff showed up a minute late and he comes in in full uniform, you know, with his four stars and he's packing a gun and, you know, he shows up, right? And when the door opened, I turned and looked at him. I wasn't running the meeting because I'm just the vice chair this year.

I looked at him and I said, afternoon. Well, the meeting starts at 7.30 in the morning, right? So good afternoon. He looked at me, made a face, right? And he sat down and the next thing you know, we're having the meeting, we're going on. And one of the staff members brought him in a cup of tea. And I'm doing this to him in the middle of the meeting, like, okay, what makes you so special here? Now this is a man, this is Orange County's top cop, right? And I he's got like 4,000, 5,000, you

that people in the department and, and, he's a, he's a really big deal. But I'm like, in that meeting, you know, we're equal, we're equal. And so he, he's just kind of making, you know, faces at me because I'm just picking on him. That's all I'm doing. Right. And then he's laughing. Right. So at the end of the meeting in answer to your question, the last thing that me laugh out loud is that we're getting ready to leave the meeting has been adjourned. And, I look up and, and I'm saying, Mike, look at me. I got a, you're awesome card.

And Dawn says to me, yeah, Laura, all know you made that for yourself.

Dr Kelly Culver (42:47)
hahahaha

Touche.

Laura Khouri (42:52)
Touche.

Jenn Quader (42:55)
He had had it. He'd had enough of that shirt. He was gonna come back at you. ⁓

Laura Khouri (42:55)
Yeah, he had enough of

that shirt. Seriously, I adore the man and he has the most wonderful wife, Marilyn. But yeah, that was really what made me laugh. I did not see that coming.

Dr Kelly Culver (43:01)
My god

What's a question you'd like to leave for future guests?

Laura Khouri (43:17)
⁓ I think that question would be ⁓ describe a time when you weren't resilient. Because I think there's always lessons to be learned from others. So what happened to you that you didn't bounce back, that you behaved in a way that you now think is embarrassing or you would have done something different? So that would be it.

Dr Kelly Culver (43:40)
rate.

Jenn Quader (43:40)
Good

question. Yeah, that's a good one. I'm I'm gonna go answer that one now. That's a really good one. All right, I have a past guest question for you. It's a little similar to one I asked, so feel free to take it however you want, but I think it's a good one. Laura, how do you balance resiliency with having self empathy? I know we already talked about self care, but How do you balance resiliency with self empathy?

Laura Khouri (43:44)
Yeah, right?

Okay.

⁓ yeah. Yes.

I have a mirror in my office, not because I like to look at myself because I sometimes hate that, but on the bottom of it, it says,

Be amazing today. And that's all about amazing grace. Balancing resiliency and self-empathy is remember the grace. Remember the grace of who you are. Remember the grace of what you bring to others and ⁓ in helping them become the best versions of themselves. And I think that's kind of really where that falls for me, if that makes any sense at all.

Jenn Quader (44:33)
Laura Khouri, it makes wonderful sense. I want to say that you stand as a beautiful example of amazing grace in all of its glory as leadership. And I thank you for encouraging that grace amongst our entire audience. think everyone at Resiliency, the podcast, and everyone within our community is always seeking to be as resilient as we can. And I think knowing that you can have that grace alongside of it is really a beautiful thing. With that, I want to ask you, Laura,

Where can our audience find you if they would like to learn more about your graceful and wonderful and all-encompassing leadership? How can they learn more about you or your company?

Laura Khouri (45:08)
Okay, well, our company is at WNG.com. ⁓ We also have WNPNapartments.com. I'm on LinkedIn under Laura Khouri. And ⁓ what else can I tell you? I think that's really how to get a hold of me. I am on Facebook and Instagram, but I don't really participate. I'm more of a watcher, right? It's kind of a voyeur of what other people do. ⁓

Jenn Quader (45:31)
Good to know.

So those

who want to connect with Laura can find her on Instagram and send her memes is what it sounds like. And I do encourage our audience to follow Laura Khouri on LinkedIn. She is always doing articles, speaking about the industry. She's talking about leadership. So I definitely encourage you find her. It's Laura K-H-O-U-R-I of Western National Property Management. Find her on LinkedIn. She is a beacon of wisdom.

Laura Khouri (45:39)
Yeah, there you go.

Thank you.

Jenn Quader (45:59)
⁓ how would our audience find Laura's house online if they would like to contribute or donate?

Laura Khouri (46:06)
laurashouse.org is where you'll find them. Yes. Thank you.

Jenn Quader (46:10)
Fantastic. So please

visit laurashouse.org if you would like to donate any of those funds or time or anything to help victims of domestic abuse. And then outside of that, ⁓ I would just like to say thank you. Thank you to Laura Khouri for coming and being a beautiful example of resilient leadership. Thank you, Dr. Kelly Culver. You are always the bestest and greatest co-host. ⁓ Ladies and gentlemen, you can find Dr. Kelly at theculvergroup.ca. That's .ca because she is the queen of Canada.

Dr Kelly Culver (46:31)
You

Laura Khouri (46:32)
you

Jenn Quader (46:39)
You can also find her at Dr. Kelly Culver on Instagram and on LinkedIn. As always, you can find me at Jenn Quader, J-E-N-N-Q-U-A-D-E-R on all the socials. You can find my company at thesmartagency.com. And with that, folks, we leave you with grace and resilience. We thank you for being with us. We ask you to please, if you liked what you heard here and if you're dedicated to resilience in your life, give us a like.

Tune in again in a couple weeks. We're gonna keep this resiliency conversation going and keep this resilience community building. Thank you all for another great episode of Resiliency, the podcast.