Resiliency The Podcast

RTP Ep 20: Our 20th Episode Extravaganza
Asef Quader (00:46.979)
Welcome everyone. I'm back to host our 20th episode. I can't believe we've made it. Here we are ladies. We've made it 20 episodes. Who would have thought?

Jenn Quader (00:57.442)
Woo woo woo! Cheer! Confetti! Woo!

Dr Kelly Culver (01:04.06)
it's, you know, it's, it's remarkable because it's less than 12 months ago that we all met in Paris, said, Hey, let's do a podcast. Asef you write up the treatment that's, know, like in six months, 20 episodes with guests from around the world. I wouldn't say that, you know, wow, it's remarkable.

Asef Quader (01:14.618)
than nine months ago.

Asef Quader (01:22.173)
around the world.

Asef Quader (01:27.151)
It is remarkable. I'm so impressed with us.

Jenn Quader (01:28.814)
Guys, P.S. We just, only heard the first trailer for Resiliency the podcast on July 31st of 2024. I think for some reason, like we started it immediately after the TEDx, which was in March, but no, not till July. So guys, we've only been doing this for a very short time and oh, it's just, what a beautiful project to do together. I love you guys.

Dr Kelly Culver (01:33.213)
Ahem.

Asef Quader (01:53.405)
It's been a blast so far. We've had so many stories. We've had so many interesting guests, so much resiliency spread. so today, and merch, let's talk about the merch. It's coming. Ching, ching.

Dr Kelly Culver (02:05.405)
and merge!

Jenn Quader (02:08.91)
Listen, I'm feeling like a director of sales and marketing, so I've got to say we got merch coming. You know what I mean? Like, merch is going to come. Kelly, doesn't a liquid taste better when it's in a resiliency, the podcast mug?

Dr Kelly Culver (02:09.74)
Kajinkajing.

Dr Kelly Culver (02:15.046)
Ahem.

Dr Kelly Culver (02:22.132)
Yes. Every time.

Jenn Quader (02:24.62)
And she's Canadian, so she wouldn't lie.

Dr Kelly Culver (02:28.136)
No.

Asef Quader (02:29.757)
truthful Canadians. We love them.

Jenn Quader (02:33.422)
So if you're listening and you'd like a resiliency the podcast mug, let us know. We're going to make some for you.

Dr Kelly Culver (02:37.195)
Ahem.

Asef Quader (02:41.243)
All right, so let's get started. I thought today we would have a little bit of fun. We're going to play 20 questions, or as Jen likes to call it, the question game. We've had a lot of guests, and we always like to end with the rapid fire questions that Kelly likes to give. And at the end of each of those questions, we ask guests to give questions for future guests.

Jenn Quader (02:53.528)
My favorite game!

Dr Kelly Culver (02:55.606)
Hmm.

Asef Quader (03:08.967)
So I thought we would incorporate some of those questions and ask our hosts what their answer would be to those questions. And then I have some other questions I threw in there to just give us a little insight into what we feel we have brought to the resilience game over the past 20 episodes. You guys ready? All right. All right. So I'm going to start with this question. And I'm actually going to start with an answer to this question.

Jenn Quader (03:30.198)
Ready!

Asef Quader (03:39.325)
And it is what has been your favorite moment over our past 19 episodes.

And I'm going to start off with saying that we have actually recorded, I want to say, 22 or 23 episodes. And that is because our very first episode with Daniela Alba, we had to record three different times. And I think you guys both remember how many times and how frustrating those first episodes have been.

Jenn Quader (04:02.486)
yeah.

Asef Quader (04:07.727)
Now, my favorite moment comes from Daniela Alba's first, what made her laugh out loud moment. And I see that Dr. Kelly is remembering what that was.

Dr Kelly Culver (04:18.729)
Yes!

Jenn Quader (04:24.29)
Yes, as does Jen Quater, because you've stolen my answer, by the way. This is the best moment in our Resiliency to Podcast history. And I'm so glad we get to talk about it. It's very important. It's very important.

Asef Quader (04:35.139)
get to talk about it. It's the best moment in resilience to podcast history that nobody's ever seen. And it is.

Dr Kelly Culver (04:35.817)
Mmm!

Dr Kelly Culver (04:40.672)
Yeah, nobody heard it. That's right.

Jenn Quader (04:40.917)
Never

Asef Quader (04:43.909)
And it is Daniela Alba telling us a story. And now remember her episode was recorded back in the summer and she is in Rome and it was a hot day in Vatican City. And she was walking and she saw one of the priests walking by and they're in their full black robes. And he stops in the middle of the walkway and he kind of just squats down and says in Italian, my balls are hot.

Asef Quader (05:14.757)
And I wish I knew what it was in Italian. I wish I knew what my balls are hawks in Italian. I'm not that worldly.

Jenn Quader (05:22.678)
sure she said it in Italian which is what made it so brilliant it was just brilliant

Dr Kelly Culver (05:24.435)
She did!

Dr Kelly Culver (05:28.478)
And then had to translate. And then she looks and she says, are you kidding me?

Jenn Quader (05:33.534)
you know, like there's nothing more resilient than someone who for real, like this is a woman, I have to just say it. This is a woman who talks about like sexual assault and trauma. Like she's talks about these major things and then she brings us into this laughter where there's this priest who's like, my balls are hot. I mean, that is comedy gold, comedy gold.

Asef Quader (05:33.629)
Hahaha

Asef Quader (05:55.513)
It is comedy gold. It was great. I wish I wish we could have saved that episode. sigh sigh it did

Jenn Quader (06:02.752)
It got to, it brought us here guys. Everything we do, we've got to confidently walk in that wrong direction, don't we?

Asef Quader (06:09.371)
That's right, exactly. All right, Dr. Kelly, what's your favorite moment over the past 19 episodes?

Dr Kelly Culver (06:16.716)
Well, I don't have one. thing is we laugh a lot. And I think one of the key factors for resilience is being able to laugh and share humor. And so I'd have to say what we've just talked about, I just think we move to the next question.

because that just it's the cherry on the icing on the cake.

Jenn Quader (06:39.682)
You know, she's right. It was totally my answer. like, can't, every other moment that I think about, they all move into that communal resilience moment. I will though, actually I lie. There's another one. I really loved our episode about composting. I found that really, really interesting because it's so.

Asef Quader (06:44.196)
You

Jenn Quader (07:02.616)
foreign to me. It is not, you know, and I thought the idea where, and I thought it was really cool that we got like the little kids who had drone the compost and we put that into the episode. I think that resilience, you know, we laughed in an earlier episode that we were recording and we said, this isn't a family show because we speak our minds in a clear way. But I like the fact that like we look at the whole person and

And kids are a part of that world. And so to see that through their eyes, that was another favorite moment for me.

Asef Quader (07:34.25)
And clarity means we curse.

Dr Kelly Culver (07:37.226)
Yeah. Yep.

Jenn Quader (07:37.39)
Yeah we fucking do.

Asef Quader (07:42.385)
Resilient to the podcast. The tagline is we curse.

Jenn Quader (07:44.202)
I guess, buy a mug! We curse to prove we're human. And because it feels so damn good.

Asef Quader (07:48.219)
You

Asef Quader (07:53.521)
All right, so my next question to you both, I'll start with Dr. Kelly. Is there anything you have learned about resilience since starting the podcast?

Dr Kelly Culver (08:01.1)
Hmm

Dr Kelly Culver (08:07.98)
When I was doing my research on resilience, I discovered that there's 47 different definitions for the term resilience. And this podcast has confirmed that. So it's not necessarily have I learned something new about resilience. It's confirming the fact that resilience means so many things to so many people in so many different ways.

Asef Quader (08:34.631)
Jen, what about you?

Jenn Quader (08:37.122)
What I have learned is that I need more resilience. And that is not a joke, that's not a joke, it's a truth. Like I really, like, you you come into something like this and you think, hey, I talked about this and I'm a central player in these stories being told. But as I'm taking this on, it is a big ask to do this alongside running a company and alongside, you know, building your other life passions.

Asef Quader (08:43.121)
Mm-hmm.

Jenn Quader (09:06.018)
You know, and so you have to be able to, resilience is one thing, prioritization is another. You know what I mean? Like, and they both have to play well together. And so what I've learned through this is that even when you are in the game, you have to be sharpening your game. And so I am constantly learning from our guests, learning from Dr. Kelly and thinking about my own pants of steel in my daily life. And I continue to face challenges like,

not knowing if I can do it all. And so I think that that has been very humbling and human and real and honest.

Asef Quader (09:42.407)
Yeah, resilience is an exercise. You got to keep it up, right? You can't. Like Jen does yoga regularly. If you take a couple weeks off of yoga, it kind of hurts again.

Dr Kelly Culver (09:45.664)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Dr Kelly Culver (09:54.988)
You start to tighten up, it's really, I'm glad you brought up that analogy, Asif, because, and again, I'll come back to some research. The World Economic Forum talks about building a resiliency muscle.

Jenn Quader (09:55.342)
Start to tighten up.

Asef Quader (10:09.137)
Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Dr Kelly Culver (10:10.74)
and they see it as a muscle because it contracts, it expands, you have to work on it all the time. Yep.

Asef Quader (10:16.285)
Totally makes sense. Absolutely.

Jenn Quader (10:18.866)
Ugh, and muscles are, they're so hard because I myself am a singer and the vocal cord is a muscle. it's, you didn't know, you don't know that until you rupture one and then you find out. And one thing that's so interesting about that, it's such, cause you know, all, the muscles are all ripply and strong. see muscled people and they're lovely, but muscles are also so tender. You have to be so very tender with them.

Asef Quader (10:27.829)
You

Jenn Quader (10:44.01)
in order for them to heal and to operate well. And so I think that that's another lens that I've learned through resilience. know, grit and strength and all push through, you know, that is only one very small piece of the resilience puzzle. There's a lot of gentleness. There's a lot of yin and yang and balance that exists within this thing we know as resilience.

Asef Quader (11:07.055)
Absolutely. This is going to run into your answer, Jen, but I'm going to start with you on this one and see if you can elaborate. Maybe what have you learned about yourself during the podcast?

Jenn Quader (11:22.626)
that I need to learn how to prioritize. So I should tell our listeners, like, I tried to quit. I'm just going to tell them. Like, I just get it out there. I tried to, quit. And, like, I scared everybody down. was like, I can't do this anymore! And really, what I've learned about that is, really what I was saying earlier about the muscle, I think that resilience requires this desire to push yourself.

Asef Quader (11:25.157)
You

Dr Kelly Culver (11:27.948)
Yep.

Asef Quader (11:31.293)
You

Dr Kelly Culver (11:39.276)
You

Jenn Quader (11:51.242)
And then there is balance in the fact that sometimes you push yourself too hard. And so what I've learned about myself is that I have a tendency to push myself too hard and that I can react in a way like, I can't do this anymore. But that if I have a very good resilient community around me, like a executive producer who I happen to be married to and live with and a wonderful, brilliant, well-educated Canadian who knows that, you know,

If you have good people around you who will help guide you and you're open and you listen to it, resilience can actually heal you out of that. So what I've learned about myself is that I have lots of improvement to make and that community is really important in making those improvements.

Dr Kelly Culver (12:39.82)
I'm glad you talked about that story because, well, I'll fill in the blanks a little bit, folks. It was September, and I was in the UK launching a new company with a business partner. The company's called the Resilience Nexus. It's about nine o'clock at night, my time, and I get this call from Jen. I'm done, she says. I can't do this. And.

Asef Quader (12:39.933)
Dr. Kelly?

Dr Kelly Culver (13:08.04)
We walked through it and we talked through it and we had, you know, really good heartfelt deep discussions. And, you know, you don't have to be everything to everybody all the time. It's just how do you, you know, life is in a number of channels like your television, you change your channel on the TV. So how do you go back and forth changing the channel? And I think we've learned collectively how to do that with each other and for the podcast.

Asef Quader (13:35.761)
Absolutely.

Jenn Quader (13:35.95)
Well, and I have a, I wanna say this too, cause I really value that. I have a dear friend that has told me before, she said, you know, if you're in a room, a big, envision like a big warehouse and it's completely dark and you had a very small tea light and you lit that candle, where would everyone's eyes go? They would go to the very small light. And her point was,

Dr Kelly Culver (14:00.885)
You

Jenn Quader (14:03.66)
You don't have to shine floodlights. You only have to do a small tea light. And I think that's what I, you know, sometimes my perspective is like, we gotta go, we gotta do it all. And I think that through some very wise discussions, we can find out that we can continue the mission. We can keep this resilience. And see, I'm in on the mission. When I say I was done, I was done with the pressure, which a lot of people get done with, the pressure of the schedule and the how to get all this, you know, and show up the way I need to.

but the ability to tell these stories, we're just beginning. And what you're doing, Dr. Kelly, and I wonder if you could talk about it for just a minute, the idea that you are working primarily in the UK, but toward a movement about resilience that goes beyond just individual stories, but looks at like the workforce. Can you talk about that a little? Is that something we can talk about, Asif? Are you cool with that? Kick it, yeah.

Asef Quader (14:58.083)
Absolutely, it's important.

Dr Kelly Culver (15:01.536)
The so coming out of you know, the work that we're doing here in resilience to the podcast. This is the fun part of the work for resilience for me. And you know, a lot of you will know now that I studied resilience. I have a doctorate in it. So I'm a doctor of resilience. And there seems to be a real market for the concept of building building resilience in Europe. It's coming slowly to Canada, it'll probably hit the US faster. But

What's a strategic resilience framework for a company? How do you create resilience at the level of a board of directors? How do you help CEOs and leaders navigate through the turbulence and the uncertainty? How do you give them those tools? How do you create ways to measure resilience so that you've got a dashboard that shows you trends and indicators and you can grab those opportunities and not have them fly by you because you were turning around trying to build back after a crisis?

So it's looking at that and there's a really strong market for it in the UK. So a partner and I have come together and we've created something called the Resilience Nexus. And it's really fun.

Jenn Quader (16:13.324)
Well, it's more than fun, it's so important because, and I'm going to say this gently, but there's a whole world of people in many, different countries who don't want to work, who aren't driven to work, who don't understand why work will heal their soul, who think that it's, you know, they think that it's working for the man and that, you know, and so they don't know where to place their energy. And I think that really at that level, when you're talking about

Dr Kelly Culver (16:16.204)
You

Jenn Quader (16:40.494)
helping CEOs and business leaders and then that trickles down to every person we talk to here, which we've talked to some CEOs and business leaders, some leaders at Apple who worked with Steve Jobs and Tim Cook, and then we've talked with, you know, just the everyday man who just talked to someone who went through a stroke, you know. So everyone has those stories and I think harnessing this idea that resilience is important in the workplace and in life and that that

That can be Venn diagrammed is how I would say that. That I think is the message of the 2025 and beyond.

Dr Kelly Culver (17:12.606)
Yes. Yep.

Dr Kelly Culver (17:18.4)
That's right. It's the

It's the stone that you throw into the lake or the ocean and you get the ripple effects. So there's your Venn diagram, the circle and the circle and the circle and the circle. So this is what we're doing is building community. How do we create healthy workplaces? How do we leverage opportunities? But how do we have a really good, strong, engaged workforce around the world that then builds resilience and it helps us with our families, helps us with schools, helps us at home and helps us at people. So it's like the elevator.

You know, what happens on the first floor happens on the 13th floor and we go up and down the elevator. That's the community that we're building together.

Asef Quader (17:57.053)
It helps us juggle work and being podcast hosts and being singers and being corporate animals.

Dr Kelly Culver (18:01.672)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Jenn Quader (18:08.436)
It's true! It's so true.

Asef Quader (18:11.389)
So let me jump into some questions from our past guests. You guys ready? All right. All right, Dr. Kelly, what would be your epitaph?

Dr Kelly Culver (18:18.603)
Hmm.

Jenn Quader (18:19.778)
Heck yeah. I love all those people.

Dr Kelly Culver (18:28.556)
I struggled with this because I wanted to keep it light. when I read it and what keeps coming back to me, you know the movie Saving Private Ryan and the opening scene where the grandfather's in the cemetery looking at his comrades who didn't make it out and he said, have I lived a good life? Was I a good man? You know, it just gets you right here, right? I have because the things that I do matter.

Asef Quader (18:48.879)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Dr Kelly Culver (18:56.318)
And I can see that the change I've had around the world and the different countries that I've worked in has mattered to people. So I think on a positivity note and not sounding hopefully too egotistical, it's that everything I've done matters and it's made a difference.

Asef Quader (19:14.589)
It made a difference in my life. I can tell you that right off the bat.

Dr Kelly Culver (19:16.876)
Thank you. Thank you.

Jenn Quader (19:18.67)
Same here, absolutely, and many, many others. I wholeheartedly agree with that and uphold that, Dr. Kelly.

Asef Quader (19:22.781)
Mm-hmm.

Dr Kelly Culver (19:26.102)
Thank you.

Asef Quader (19:26.341)
Absolutely. I knew you were special from the moment I met you. I remember you walking up to me in the TEDx rehearsal and you came up and after Jen gave her speech you gave me a big hug and a kiss on the cheek and I was like...

Dr Kelly Culver (19:40.985)
Yep. Yep.

Asef Quader (19:41.969)
You

Jenn Quader (19:44.206)
She's a special, special lady. We're happy to have her as family.

Asef Quader (19:47.589)
Mm-hmm. Jen, what would be your epitaph?

Dr Kelly Culver (19:47.83)
Thank you.

Dr Kelly Culver (19:52.085)
you

Jenn Quader (19:53.496)
Well, I said this on my episode and I don't want to change it, which is she had a voice. And that, I really don't want to change it. I really, that is, and I think that was for our listeners, you my struggle last year was that I wanted to put out an album and I did. And that was so exciting and such a cool passion project for me. And because I did that and also was trying to run a company and also was trying to be a host of a podcast.

Dr Kelly Culver (20:00.445)
Yes.

Dr Kelly Culver (20:06.112)
Cough

Jenn Quader (20:21.91)
It started to feel like too much. But I think that when I look through the lens of what I have to offer, kind like you said, Dr. Kelly, you've done things that matter and you've done it where your heart is. And I think that's what's really important is you've got to follow your heart. There's something I heard once and it said, be aware of where you are consistently brought to tears for that is where God lives in you. I am, know, music does it to me in a way, I'm sure it does it to many others, but just for me.

I have a very special connection to it. And so I think looking back on my life, I hope that what I am is a, I like to say that I'm an interpreter. You know, like when you put an interpreter at the United Nations, they don't have to be like high level polly. They don't have to know the strategy. They just have to interpret what is being said. And I think that that's my role in business and it's my role in entertainment as a singer. And it's my role here is to just help to interpret. So I hope that.

She has a voice would be my little epitaph. She had a

Dr Kelly Culver (21:24.051)
Absolutely.

Asef Quader (21:26.961)
When you're feeling in need of resilience, what is your go-to food or beverage, Jen?

Jenn Quader (21:35.288)
Chicken and rice.

Asef Quader (21:39.655)
That's a different answer than what it used to be.

Jenn Quader (21:40.078)
Okay, this, yeah it is. So guys, just FYI, when you reach your mid-40s, your digestive system is different than when it was younger. So it used to be pizza. I used to be a big pizza fan and now I'm a chicken and rice kind of gal. But actually the truth is no, when I wanna feel resilient, the very best thing that I can put into my body is, I think it's the best thing.

on earth, think honestly, probably a gift from the universe, and that is cracking open a bottle of IBC root beer. Guys, there's nothing like IBC root beer to make your life happy. I'm just gonna be honest, that is my resilient food.

Asef Quader (22:22.569)
And just for clarity, we are not getting any money from IBC. This is not marketing. The only thing we're marketing is resiliency the podcast, not root beer from anybody.

Jenn Quader (22:27.042)
No, no, no, we give them all our money. No, listen.

Jenn Quader (22:35.567)
I know, but I'll tell ya, it's delicious.

It's a bottle of happy.

Dr Kelly Culver (22:42.88)
I did not expect that. I did not expect that. man. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Forget that. In fact, you know what? I'm... it's horrible. It's horrible.

Asef Quader (22:44.785)
Dr. Kelly, it, what is it for you, poutine?

Asef Quader (22:52.733)
Poutine is delicious, hold on. what? I love poutine, it's delicious. Poutine it in my mouth.

Jenn Quader (22:58.254)
Curds. Curds in a way.

Dr Kelly Culver (23:02.196)
No.

gravy, cheese curds, and french fries. No.

Asef Quader (23:08.069)
And where'd you go wrong with that trio?

Dr Kelly Culver (23:11.212)
Well cholesterol.

Jenn Quader (23:16.526)
she's trying to be wise about her food decisions. All right, let's hear this resilient choice.

Asef Quader (23:19.278)
Okay, okay, okay

Dr Kelly Culver (23:19.692)
No, so, so, okay. So it's so it's a toss up. It's so rather than food, you know what works best for me, getting outside in the fresh air and going for a walk every single time, even if it's raining or snowing. That's what I have to do. My favorite beverage is water followed cold water followed very closely by red wine, but cold water. You know, it's

Asef Quader (23:45.789)
Jesus's beverage.

Jenn Quader (23:46.734)
Nice. Yeah.

Dr Kelly Culver (23:49.044)
Yeah, it's just, it's the air. But you know, food. If I had to choose food, then it's my time in Mauritius, which is this eclectic palette of French cuisine, high level French cuisine, Chinese, Indian, African is brilliant, or jerk chicken barbecue in Antigua on a Friday.

Asef Quader (24:12.509)
That sounds very resilient to me. That sounds like what I want to do on Friday with an IBC root beer. Yeah. Wait, can we go back to the red wine? Red wine sounds fantastic. Though I don't know if a jerk chicken if red wine is the best thing, but.

Jenn Quader (24:15.894)
with an IBC root beer.

Dr Kelly Culver (24:17.76)
with an IBC root bear. Because it's only on Fridays.

Jenn Quader (24:23.534)
Yeah, there you go. There you go. That's what the root beer would work better with the jerk.

Dr Kelly Culver (24:26.508)
It is trust me. yes. No, no, no, no red wine works really well cuts through the spice works fine. Trust me I know what I'm talking about

Asef Quader (24:31.983)
Okay. Okay. Okay. Maybe a little like a dark maybe a Sarah or something. Okay. Okay.

Jenn Quader (24:33.646)
Good to know, alright. Trust me, trust her, she's a doctor.

Dr Kelly Culver (24:40.743)
She knows what she's doing.

Asef Quader (24:44.231)
Kelly, what do you want to be when you grow up?

Dr Kelly Culver (24:49.238)
Can I reframe the question? through all the, okay, so through all the things that we go through in life, and I say we as opposed to me, I'll make it we, because all of us collectively have gone through a lot of things in life. I find you've got to be grown up for so long. You know when you're a kid, all you want to do is grow up because you want to be like the adults, you want to be able to do all those things. What do I want to do? I want to find time to stop being grown up.

Asef Quader (24:51.421)
It's your podcast.

Asef Quader (25:10.759)
Mm-hmm.

Dr Kelly Culver (25:20.33)
That's what I want.

Jenn Quader (25:22.638)
Good answer. Ooh, that's a good answer. Dang boo, that's like a Walt Disney answer. Look at Dr. Kelly just dropping bombs today. I mean, really, like that's really good.

Dr Kelly Culver (25:27.21)
Yeah.

Yeah, that's what I want.

Asef Quader (25:30.183)
Ha

Dr Kelly Culver (25:34.407)
Ha!

Asef Quader (25:37.149)
Ha

Jenn Quader (25:38.254)
Damn. I like this 20th episode. But not after what Dr. Kelly just said, no. Sheesh. No, I have a canned answer for this, but it's a truth. And it's something that I... So I wanna be an old lady actress. That is my dream.

Asef Quader (25:40.103)
Well, Jen, do you want to be a kid when you grow up?

Dr Kelly Culver (25:41.227)
Ahem.

Dr Kelly Culver (25:47.936)
Dear.

Asef Quader (25:48.701)
I wanna be a kid when I grow up.

Jenn Quader (25:59.144)
And I learned this because I had, my company, we represent commercial real estate and finance companies. And so I had this, we were working with a developer and they build these apartment communities and they build arts focused apartment communities. And several of them are for seniors. And so I was going to do these stories and I'm meeting these seniors who are all doing commercials and working and I'm thinking, now man, that sounds fun.

Dr Kelly Culver (26:26.986)
Mm-hmm.

Jenn Quader (26:27.072)
And so the other thing that I am is I'm very, I'm like anti-beauty. Like I really like wrinkles. I think wrinkles are cool and like I like that I'm getting them here and they're coming. And so for me, what I want to be when I grow up is a wrinkled old lady actress.

Asef Quader (26:47.249)
love it. I love it.

Jenn Quader (26:48.28)
But I've had lots of people tell me that I can say that now. And in fact, I was at a conference recently and I told this woman this and she said, yeah, I'm gonna set a reminder for about eight years from now. I'm gonna check with you and see if you still have that.

Dr Kelly Culver (26:53.429)
Yeah

Dr Kelly Culver (27:02.304)
Yep.

Asef Quader (27:06.937)
Okay, Jen, if resilience is your superpower, what does your superhero outfit look

Dr Kelly Culver (27:10.42)
Ahem.

Jenn Quader (27:17.088)
A fully sequined gown sliced up the leg. is full sequined, it is shine, and it is cut and tailored, and it is polished, and it's bright.

Asef Quader (27:21.213)
You

Asef Quader (27:34.365)
Dr. Kelly.

Dr Kelly Culver (27:35.979)
red dress and red shoes.

Jenn Quader (27:38.124)
Woo! We're going out on the town.

Asef Quader (27:39.805)
Stilettos?

Dr Kelly Culver (27:41.748)
No, they're too tall now. It's not stilettos. A pair of good pumps, court shoes, but red dress, red shoes. That's it.

Asef Quader (27:43.898)
Okay.

Jenn Quader (27:49.72)
What are you wearing on our night out? If I'm in my full sequined gown and she's in her red dress, red shoes, what's your resilience outfit? Yeah.

Dr Kelly Culver (27:52.576)
Yeah. What are you wearing? What about you? Yeah.

Asef Quader (27:56.63)
dear lord. I don't know. It's prob-

Jenn Quader (28:00.724)
I bet you'll have a collar on.

Jenn Quader (28:05.123)
Listeners.

Dr Kelly Culver (28:05.256)
You know you will. You know you will.

Asef Quader (28:05.893)
For listeners to want to know this, I got yelled at by somebody on the show. You'll notice in some episodes where I was wearing a black t-shirt because I thought I was going to do like a Steve Jobs sort of look, try to be relaxed but professional. And I was told I was not professional enough and I need to put a collar on. Not for Canada. No, no, no.

Jenn Quader (28:13.326)
It wasn't me, it wasn't his wife.

Jenn Quader (28:27.534)
Not for Canada. Not for a global doctor of resilience who happens to hail from Canada.

Asef Quader (28:35.453)
You

Asef Quader (28:39.165)
So my resilient outfit, I don't know. mean, are we talking a night out or resilient night out? Then, you know, I'm probably wearing a nice sport coat, a nice well-cut suit. Some shoes that are fancy looking, gold and black looking shoes. Nice watch, trimmed beard and just trying to look my best, I suppose. Trying not to take attention away from my

Dr Kelly Culver (28:40.032)
Yeah.

Dr Kelly Culver (28:44.172)
Hmm

Jenn Quader (28:54.904)
Fancy.

Jenn Quader (29:05.198)
You

Asef Quader (29:08.071)
two hostesses with the mostesses, but not embarrass them at the same time.

Jenn Quader (29:15.342)
a valiant effort.

Asef Quader (29:16.519)
Thank you. It's hard. It's hard to sit where I'm sitting right now.

Jenn Quader (29:22.39)
No, no one feels sorry for Asif. I'm sorry. That's not, nope, that doesn't play.

Asef Quader (29:30.109)
Just trying to find resilience, that's all I'm trying to do here.

Okay.

Dr Kelly Culver (29:35.372)
you

Asef Quader (29:38.129)
What is your mantra to get through the day? Kelly.

Dr Kelly Culver (29:43.724)
Capital I, period, capital AM, period. I am.

Asef Quader (29:53.447)
elaborate.

Dr Kelly Culver (29:55.34)
You can fill in the blank at the end of whatever it is. So it's just like, yes, I am this. I am doing this. I am making this. I am persevering through this.

Jenn Quader (30:11.598)
like it because there's like a, and we talked about this in one of our episodes, I think with Mary Elizabeth, like Eckhart Tolle and the value of being present and the now. And I like that when you say I am, you are in this moment. I am drinking this tea out of my resiliency, the podcast mug. I am, you know, like I.

But no, I... Look, guys, I'm Director of Sales and Marketing, folks.

Dr Kelly Culver (30:32.762)
Shameless.

Asef Quader (30:34.557)
It's getting to that point, yes.

Jenn Quader (30:42.242)
No, I really, I like that, I am, because that puts you right in the, it puts you in the action instead of like being around it and all the thought around it.

Mine is, it's not what you do, it's who you are.

Jenn Quader (31:02.542)
So it's not what you do, it's who you are. And that I can elaborate by just saying, we spend a lot of time, I spend a lot of time, but I think everybody spends a lot of time trying to be what we need to be, trying to be the professional we need to be and be the boss we want to be and be the, maybe the parent we want to be or the sister we want to be and all those things. And I can get lost in the attempt, in the effort, in the over effort, if you will.

And so I think if I can remind myself, it's not about what I do, it's about who I am. And that allows me to just be who I am whenever I show up. I'll tell you this quick story because I think everybody lives in the world we're in. I always like to tie back to Dr. Kelly's TEDx talk where she talks about the pings and pops and how we get like, I think there's a stat in there, like we get like 3000 notifications a day or something. And I was having this problem where like people would text me and I was like, man, I don't.

Dr Kelly Culver (31:51.062)
Mm-hmm.

Jenn Quader (31:58.19)
I don't know how to get back to them. I don't know what to do. And I was working with a therapist to work through and her advice to me was just be who you are whenever you do show up. And that helped tremendously because what it meant was like if I got a text from let's say my sister and I thought I should answer right then, but I wasn't feeling right about it, I could wait and I could just wait until I was who I really am, until I could actually honestly answer it. So that's helped to guide me a lot.

Dr Kelly Culver (32:30.954)
I think that's really, really wise, Jen, is be who you are. Because then you also are consistent. You know, that's important. You're consistent.

Jenn Quader (32:40.375)
Yeah!

Yeah, that makes sense because when you are in the, that's, I hadn't thought about that. Man, because when you're in the other, when you are reacting to everything else and you're just in what you're gonna do, then yeah, like sometimes I'm gonna be in this mode, sometimes I'm gonna be in this mode, but when I'm always like set in that, know, kind of like yours, I am, I am in this moment and owning that I think is important to resilience.

Dr Kelly Culver (32:49.376)
Hmm.

Asef Quader (33:21.531)
I went through a bunch of questions. I'm trying to figure out where I want to go next with this one.

Describe to me what your life looks like in 10 years. Dr. Kelly.

Dr Kelly Culver (33:37.985)
No.

Asef Quader (33:39.165)
Hahaha

Jenn Quader (33:43.086)
Really not!

Asef Quader (33:43.901)
You

Jenn Quader (33:47.64)
cannot believe the audacity. The audacity.

Dr Kelly Culver (33:54.444)
So my life in 10 years time, elements of my life in 10 years time. Let's see. I love what I do. And I get great satisfaction out of what I do and all the places I get to go. So I have no intention of retiring. So in 10 years time, Dr. Kelly's not retired.

She's still doing all of these funky cool things all around the world that she likes to do and she's having fun and making an impact in people's lives and building this resilience community through a number of different channels. She will have gotten her act together and figured out where she wants to settle down because all of her stuff is still in storage. It's coming up three, you know, almost four years in August.

So does she build her house in Canada? She got some sort of home in North America. What does London look like? Because that's where the business is. Paris is for pleasure. She's got her act together on that because right now she doesn't. And you know, yeah, she's getting tired of that. then and then like thirdly, I think thirdly, thing is that

Jenn Quader (34:54.7)
Citizen of the world, Kelly.

Asef Quader (34:56.775)
Citizen of the world.

Dr Kelly Culver (35:06.056)
She's ready to date. Yeah. So there's.

Asef Quader (35:09.149)
Mmm.

Jenn Quader (35:10.988)
You heard it here first!

Asef Quader (35:13.245)
That's right. We're selling mugs and Dr. Kelly on resiliency, the puck.

Dr Kelly Culver (35:19.084)
So, you know, 10 years from now, there's a guy who's got the courage to be with me. Because that's what it's going to take. I know.

Asef Quader (35:25.565)
The courage, the courage. It's a brave man. It's a brave man. It's a strong man.

Jenn Quader (35:27.074)
yeah, and yeah, well it is, now he's gotta go through Ossif and Jen. Like he's got a whole, like you got a whole entourage that he's gotta prove himself to.

Dr Kelly Culver (35:35.082)
I

I know. So yeah, that's what my life looks like 10 years from now. How's that? Okay, pass the test.

Asef Quader (35:44.635)
I think that's brilliant. I love it. A plus A plus. Jen.

Jenn Quader (35:46.56)
Applause. Applause. Well done. I love it, Kelly. So that is my favorite question of all time. And that's why I, when you said no, it cracked me up because I love that question. It's my very favorite. In 10 years time, I too will not be retired. I don't, I don't see myself as a retirement kind of gal.

Dr Kelly Culver (35:49.804)
man. Thank you.

Asef Quader (36:00.125)
Ha!

Asef Quader (36:12.765)
You

Jenn Quader (36:14.614)
In 10 years time, I'm still gonna be doing what I'm doing also and making an impact. I would like to be actively doing both of my passions. So I have passion in the corporate world and I have passion in artistry. And I think that I'm already doing it. And I think that in 10 years, I'm gonna feel like I'm doing it. You know what I mean? Like when you first start something, it still feels quite new. But I think I will be kind of a more fully realized person who's able to share that. And then from that,

Dr Kelly Culver (36:38.569)
Mm-hmm.

Jenn Quader (36:44.234)
in 10 years, I think I'll see the impact of that. And again, there's this lovely catch-22 that as an artist, and I also think as a business person, you have to know what the result is you're going for, but then you have to not really pursue the exact result. Meaning, I can't pursue having a big audience or having a bunch of partnerships or things like that. But what I know is that in 10 years,

the impact of this resilience movement will be felt and I will see that it has helped people for the better. And I think in whatever way that is, that's what I see. And then I also just in the pragmatic way, like I want to own my house fully. So we, you know, like everybody else took out a mortgage and then we refied that mortgage, but I wanna see what happens when you actually like get that thing paid off. So I think in 10 years,

I'd like to see if I could get this whole thing, just own this little spot of land that's mine. That's kind of my, that's my little 10 year plan. And have a third dog.

Dr Kelly Culver (37:47.445)
Amen.

Asef Quader (37:47.901)
Thanks.

Dr Kelly Culver (37:52.365)
She's looking, if you're just listening to us folks, you can't see the look on Asif's face when she said, their dog. It's like, mother of God, save me.

Jenn Quader (38:02.254)
It's a sad life.

Asef Quader (38:02.597)
No, that's right. Yeah, we have two dogs that I'm surprised aren't barking their heads off right now.

Jenn Quader (38:06.574)
So awesome!

Jenn Quader (38:12.523)
Yeah, well if they knew what mommy was plotting they would be

Asef Quader (38:15.589)
They would not be happy about it.

Jenn Quader (38:18.862)
Where do you see yourself in 10 years? What is your life like in 10 years?

Dr Kelly Culver (38:22.614)
Ahem.

Asef Quader (38:25.469)
Not a third dog.

Asef Quader (38:34.405)
In 10 years, know, hopefully, hopefully someone's listening to this in 10 years from now. And we're doing our 500th episode celebration. They're listening to the 20th episode saying, wow, these guys are idiots. They had no idea what they were going to do in 10 years.

Asef Quader (39:01.371)
No, I, you know, I, I, I can barely think what's going to happen next week. 10 years from now, I hope, I hope we have our house paid off. I hope Kelly has a great man on her arm. I hope that's all our companies are doing well. I hope we have Jen is a multi-platinum singing artists.

I hope I hope we are. This is going to sound. This isn't going to come out the way I wanted to, but I hope people realize that resilience in this world is is a necessity and that we have played a part in that in their lives. Yeah.

Dr Kelly Culver (39:32.69)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Jenn Quader (39:33.582)
Me too, me too!

Asef Quader (40:00.285)
Not a great answer, but I'm riding the coattails of your two.

Dr Kelly Culver (40:02.492)
it's perfect. No, it's absolutely perfect. It was a good answer, a really good answer. Because you wrapped everything together, Asif. It was really good.

Jenn Quader (40:04.504)
That was a good answer.

Asef Quader (40:13.137)
Well, wrapping it up a little bit, what is one question you would like to leave a future guest, Dr.

Dr Kelly Culver (40:25.152)
I'd like to leave and it's around the question of resilience. And so to get people to help people visualize in their mind what resilience is to them. So if you're thinking about resilience, what does it feel like? What does it smell like? And what does it taste like?

Jenn Quader (40:45.996)
interesting.

Dr Kelly Culver (40:47.884)
Because we use all our senses to experience life. But we forget those.

Asef Quader (40:56.999)
I'm writing these down so I can keep them. So if you see, if there are pause, it's because I'm writing, not that the pause won't be edited out. Jen, question for a future guest.

Dr Kelly Culver (40:58.663)
Hahaha!

Jenn Quader (41:09.314)
Mine, I'm gonna be honest and say that mine comes from another source, which is to say that I love the question game and I've played it with friends for a long time. And this question came up in one of those books you find at Barnes and Noble that has all the questions to ask of relationships. But I really love this one. And it is, what would you do if you had no fear?

Asef Quader (41:23.389)
you

Dr Kelly Culver (41:32.714)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Jenn Quader (41:34.262)
What would you do if you had no fear? I had a friend once who said I would wear sleeveless shirts. And I thought, what a great answer. Great answer. Solid answer.

Asef Quader (41:46.461)
All right, I'm going to I'm going to ask one more question for you guys. And it is what do you see for resiliency the podcast over 2025 and beyond? Jen.

Jenn Quader (42:01.926)
I see us continuing to evolve in a way that feels understandable. Like we are a known, like we're a family member growing with you. You know what I mean? Like I see the storytelling evolving. I see our connection evolving. And so I think that the, like a good series, it's gonna keep going. But I think it's always gonna feel a little bit like chicken soup.

You know, like, like it'll always be what you know it is, which is going to be those stories of inspiration and, finding people from different walks of life. I think that there's a lot to be said for diversity. There's a lot to be said for global diversity. And so I think that as 2025 continues and beyond what resiliency the podcast is going to do is keep the conversation alive.

among all sorts of people and then be a home to our listeners for a place where they can come and get that inspiration in a consistent way.

Asef Quader (43:10.077)
Absolutely. And I think we have, we've talked about this, I think all of us together at one point, we've had people from all over the place tell us we should concentrate on this or we should concentrate on that, or you should have this guess or you should, they try to put us into a box of what they think resilience is. And I think all of us realize that resilience is not one thing or another thing. As Dr. Kelly said at the beginning of this episode, there are 47 different

definitions for resilience and we're not going to placate to one or another. want to focus on humanity and humanity is all of us together. Once again, coming back to the community of resilience. That's what we want to focus on. We want to focus on all of us because we're all in this together.

Dr. Kelly.

Dr Kelly Culver (44:04.242)
No, that's exactly my wish as well. You know, talk about what do we want to do for 2025. It's continuing to build the community, continuing to build the movement, continuing to have traction in this space, so that we supply people with with information sources toolkit as Jen, as you said, it's that it's, it's the family member that you come to and listen to when you need some good advice. This is where you're coming. We're not self help therapists in any way.

but we're building the resilience community. And there's so many insights that you can come here and you can listen to and you can change. So I think it's when I hear both of you speak, I'm aligned with that vision as well. And I think it's a brilliant masterstroke.

Asef Quader (44:50.907)
Masterstruck.

Jenn Quader (44:51.554)
A master stroke. I like it. I want to say this on the topic of the kind of self-help and all that stuff, because I agree there's a whole genre of that. I was editing my LinkedIn profile, which I will recommend to any and all business professionals. It's January, if you haven't looked, give it a little look. But I was editing my LinkedIn profile and doing a couple updates.

Dr Kelly Culver (44:52.929)
Mm-hmm.

Dr Kelly Culver (44:57.612)
Ahem.

Dr Kelly Culver (45:11.051)
Yep.

Jenn Quader (45:14.028)
And what I wrote was a truth, but I think it's important as we look through the lens of 2025 and why we're doing this, why is this important for people to come to? And what I wrote was, mentorship and inspiration are important to me. And that's really what this is. This is mentorship, whether Dr. Kelly is mentoring me or I'm mentoring someone or Mike Anderson, the media mogul is mentoring us. There is mentorship being shared through these conversations.

Dr Kelly Culver (45:39.86)
you

Jenn Quader (45:43.93)
like on all levels. And then this is a source of inspiration. There's no doubt. And so I think as I look at that, that's where we fall. We are a community of mentorship and inspiration across business, across personal, across lives.

Asef Quader (46:02.973)
I love it. I love it. And with that, that's 20 episodes, guys.

Dr Kelly Culver (46:04.128)
Yes.

Asef Quader (46:12.029)
We did 20 of them so far. When we first started this, I was talking to a producer and they said the hardest thing to do in this business is get through 10 episodes and then get through 20 episodes. People always end between 10 and 20 episodes and it's hard to keep going. And to everyone who's out there listening right now, watching right now on YouTube, we're gonna keep going. We got episodes in the can, they're gonna be coming out here, so.

Dr Kelly Culver (46:12.192)
Ha

Jenn Quader (46:13.24)
Cheers, guys!

Dr Kelly Culver (46:18.166)
You

Asef Quader (46:40.231)
Keep following us. We're going to every two weeks now. You probably recognize that already. We were once a week. We're going to every two weeks. Keep following us. Keep watching us. Resiliency, pardon me, Resiliencythepodcast.com. Follow us on YouTube. Like us everywhere you can. You can follow Jen at JenQuater.com. You can follow her at JenQuater. You can follow her company, The Smart Agency at

thesmartagency.com. You can find Dr. Kelly at the Culver Group, or is it just Culver Group? It's culvergroup.ca. And that's because she is from Canada, or as I like to call it, the 51st state.

Dr Kelly Culver (47:15.638)
Culver group.

Dr Kelly Culver (47:24.64)
Have you seen the map? Whoa, now. Have you seen the map of greater Canada lately?

Jenn Quader (47:25.998)
What?

Asef Quader (47:32.797)
I believe you sent us a text of it. Yeah, it's pretty good.

Jenn Quader (47:34.798)
It's beautiful from your breath, it's pretty good.

Dr Kelly Culver (47:37.26)
pretty good goes all the way down to the Mexican border

Asef Quader (47:40.605)
You

Jenn Quader (47:42.808)
greater Canada. Listen, you've always had a good Canada song. I'm ready. I'm ready, Kelly. I'm ready to join forces. Do we all get horses and maple syrup?

Dr Kelly Culver (47:53.15)
You're gonna get maple syrup. Horses, I don't know.

Asef Quader (47:56.081)
Dr. Horace says, moose, we get moose.

Jenn Quader (47:56.458)
Horses, the Mounties, moose, yeah, chocolate moose, and bears. We have those in California too.

Dr Kelly Culver (47:59.03)
Get moose. Bears. Bears. Not bears.

Asef Quader (48:01.053)
Embarrassed.

Dr Kelly Culver (48:07.67)
Yeah.

Asef Quader (48:08.571)
Well, before we go too, too much off the rails here, everyone, thank you for listening. 20 episodes in the book, 20 more to come. We love you all. Stay resilient, stay strong, be happy, be healthy. Go help someone. There's a lot of people who need help. Resiliency is all about help. We love you guys. Bye.